Harley Quinn's (un: clownprincess) Inbox for Reparacija

[ridetheharley]

 

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[ridetheharley]

You better.

[ Harley can't help but laugh at the face Jesse makes at her and she scoots close once he sinks onto the loveseat with her. So, maybe she's less interested in the movie and more interested in feeling the warmth of Jesse's side against her as she leans into him. Harley can't help herself. She's a very touchy-feely kind of person, and she feels particularly that way around Jesse. Harley reaches for the popcorn, tossing a few pieces into her mouth as she listens to Jesse talk. Ooh! She knows this one! ]

Fish are so weird! They just get into a group and the females lay a bunch of eggs and the males go around and jizz all over 'em. But whales and dolphins and sharks and stuff have sex. Oh! But some sharks lay eggs after they have sex. The ocean is weird as hell. No rules down there. Shit just does what it feels like. But mermaids are, like, half-human so...I don't think any of that applies.

[ Leave it to Harley to know strange facts. No need for Mr. White here! Harley's a regular encyclopedia of random knowledge. A lot of it isn't necessarily useful for everyday life, but it's plenty entertaining. ]

[blueshit]

[ Of course Harley knows. It's easy to forget with how down-to-earth (or down-to-alien-planet) she is and how much she likes to party, but she's smart, too. A doctor. It's no wonder she knows all about fish sex. ]

Wait, are you saying fish have orgies?

[ Because that's sure what it sounds like to him. Jesse pauses, letting the implications really sink in, and then makes a comically horrified face when they hit. ]

And what, the ocean's just full of fish jizz?

[ Maybe it's better not to know this shit, after all. He turns back to the screen, watching the mermaid with new, somewhat terrified eyes. ]

Yeah, she's half human, but it's the wrong half, Harley! [ He points to the screen, for emphasis. ] You just wait! Any second now, she's gonna make that dude bukkake all over her fuckin' eggs!

[ridetheharley]

[ It's not just school that taught her this stuff. Harley's always had a natural curiosity about her and, having grown up in the days before Google existed, she used to have to actually go to the library and read a bunch of stuff if there was something about the world that she wanted to know. Kids these days have it easy. With things like Alexa they don't even have to type anything to get an answer. It's a little sad, to her. The end of an era. But with progress comes good things, too.

She looks over at Jesse, the weed causing her to contemplate things far more deeply than usual, so it takes her a few moments before she opens her mouth to respond. ]

I guess, technically, yeah. I don't think all species do it that way, though. I don't know. That's about as far as my fish knowledge goes, but maybe I'll read up on it later because now I'm kinda' curious.

[ Harley laughs when Jesse starts to get more and more freaked out, a brow raising at the horrified look on his face. ]

No! It's not full of it. It's like...I don't know, they mate in specific areas. Usually on the ocean floor.

[ Harley reaches for her soda after she pours the rest of a box of chocolatey treats into her mouth, tossing aside the empty box onto a spare seat. She gulps down the soda and it's mid-sip when Jesse starts to freak the fuck out. His outburst catches Harley off guard, but it's something about the 'bukkake all over her fuckin' eggs' line mixed with the genuine horror on his face that makes her lose it entirely. It's the Ultimate Spit Take a moment later, soda spraying from her mouth like a living fountain statue. She manages to douse whoever's sitting in front of her and yep, there it is. Their cue to leave. Harley manages to choke out words between laughing so hard that her stomach hurts. ]

Oh my God, Jesse, we gotta go.

[blueshit]

[ It's slightly reassuring to hear that the water right near the beach isn't (necessarily?) full of fish cum, but only slightly. Jesse still looks horrified and slightly panicked, and Harley's spittake doesn't help, and neither does the way the person she'd sprayed soda all over turns to glare daggers at him. Jesse's eyes open wide in dismay and alarm. ]

Oh shit - sorry man -

[ Apologies can only go so far, though. The guy doesn't look any less angry, and Jesse barely has time to grab his own drink and a couple boxes of candy before he and Harley are dashing up the aisle and back outside. ]

Shit - oh fuck -

[ Harley may be laughing, but Jesse's still caught up in wild-eyed panic, looking back behind them every few seconds. ]

Fuck, Harley, that dude's gonna kill us!

[ It is kinda funny, though. Or at least, the way Harley's still giggling her ass off is funny. Jesse starts to relax, shoulders slumping in releif as a smile starts to spread across his face, and then he's laughing too, bending over with his hands on his knees, grinning so hard it hurts. ]

Oh man...I can't believe we're never gonna find out how mermaids fuck...

[ridetheharley]

[ Laughing is an understatement, Harley is straight-up cackling. She can barely see where she's going as she stumbles blindly towards the light, which can only mean the doors leading to the outside. He soda is sloshing around loudly in her cup as she clutches her stomach, bending over to try and get a breath in. Tears are literally streaming down her face as she goes silent, only to straighten up, suck in a breath and laugh loudly towards the sky. She's waving her hand at Jesse as if telling him to stop even though he isn't even doing anything. It's just the look on his face, his panic about the guy she just sprayed with soda. It's everything. ]

Ohmygod. Breathe, Harley.

[ She takes a deep breath finally, her laughter dying down only to look over at Jesse, seeing him bent and holding his knees and she cracks up all over again. ]

Oh man. Whew! Okay. Holy shit. Maybe they'll have a re-run on The Inmate Channel or something. I feel like I need to know.

[ Harley talks as she's wiping the tears and running mascara from her face. Damn. It's been a long time since she laughed like that. ]

Or maybe I can score a mermaid costume from somewhere.

[ Harley wiggles her brows and then laughs again. It doesn't seem like the guy is chasing after them, but maybe moving away from the entrance of the Activities building wouldn't be such a bad idea. ]

Let's go find some shit to do.